When a bride dreams of her wedding day, she envisions herself, the groom and the pastor at the altar. What she fails to realize is that in actuality that maybe the case ,but theoretically all of your family and future in-laws should be present at the altar as well because not only are you marrying you honey but all of them too! In-laws are a huge part of marriage. Not only is your promising to make a lifelong commitment with your honey but also to your honey’s parents. Your Future in-laws can hurt or help a marriage. In order to establish a good relationship with your future in-laws, it must start from the moment your honey proposes. The impression you set during the wedding planning process will set the stage for your relationship with your future in-laws in the future.
The mantra we all learned in kindergarten still applies when dealing with in-laws. As your in-laws drive you up the wall, remember to be patient and be nice. Anything you don’t want to do or disagree with, put the blame on your fiancé or allow him to mediate or explain the situation to his mother. No matter what you must remain nice, after all you are entering into their family
Treat your new mother in law as you would treat your mother
Include your mother in-law in all wedding related functions. Let her in on the details or issues surrounding the wedding. Invite your future mother in law to dress fittings, floral selection, and tastings .If your mother is there, than your future mother in law should be there as well. If you embrace her early on and allow her to feel a part of the wedding, she will feel welcomed and like family. Starting a strong foundation during the wedding planning process will only help your future relationships.
Respect their traditions or culture
Never be close-minded if your new in-laws have certain traditions that they do for weddings, be respectful, learn the culture and find a way to incorporate in your wedding. By accepting their cultures, it shows respect and also how much you love their son and embrace their family
If you have a bridal party, invite family members of both sides to participate in your wedding
Since a wedding is essentially the uniting of two families, it’s only fair for the bridal party to reflect that. Even if you don’t want in-laws in the bridal party, you can have them read a poem or be a host. Let them feel like family and apart of the wedding by showing a reflection of both sides
I know this seems insane but truthfully it will help. Most in laws don’t have distaste for their new family member they just don’t like change and don’t quite know the effects that a marriage will have on their future relationship with their loved one. They fear that they will no longer have a place in their life.
Give it time
Weddings tend to bring out the very worse in people. Very close family member will do and say some of the most disturbing things. If any issues should arise, try not to hold a grudge. The mixed emotions of a wedding can literally drive an in-law mad. Always remember that good relationships don’t happen overnight. It takes time and just because it’s chaotic and unnatural now does not reflect the future. Be open to the fact that things can get better.
If they pay, they have a say
If you don’t want your in-laws to have any input or say on when and how you spend your money on the wedding. Simply don’t accept money from them. Some brides think they can spend their dime but don’t want them to speak their minds. That won’t work. People always feel free to open their mouths when they are opening their wallets.